Starting Fresh

Well Well Well. How do I even begin this? I think I will just start with the beginning of January. School started up again for me and I was not a happy camper. Going from livin' on my own, to being told what to do and how to do it was not working. But, I went along with it and it hasn't turned out too bad. The first month back was easily the worst. I never realized that my experience in Iceland would really show my who my true friends are, but it did. I left Monument having people at the house day and night and constantly doing something with a lot of people, to come home and have to search and search for just one person to hang with. Not exactly my style. :) ---side note, I'm going to just start another story into this, so try to follow--- While I spent lots of time alone and hanging with the family, I decided I would try to memorize a verse each week. So I started with Ephesians 5:2 as I randomly turned to it. :) "Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn't love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that." Love that, don't you? So, I started to go by that more often.

Some awesome stuff began falling into place in my life. Finally decided on a college after an incredible visit in January. I will be playing soccer at Indiana Wesleyan University and studying Recreational Management. My dream job outside of college is to be a camp counselor. IWU is absolutely perfect for me. Everything about it, ok well maybe not that its in Indiana, but i know that is where I'm supposed to be. Maybe God will place some corn children into my life! :) The team was everything and more that i had hoped for also. I stayed with Kylie Dial and spent a lot of time with Megan Marshall. Both awesome, incredible girls. I cannot thank them enough for helping me make my decision to be there. I loved the week i was there, Summit. Once a week each semester guest speakers come in and do a morning and night 7 day lesson thing. I loved it. And Chapel was a perfect combination of Forest Ridge CC and New Life. Therefore, perfect! The coach is also super friendly. He is helping me possibly get hooked up with the rock wall there and maybe a job already! can things get any better?!?! i submit that they cannot! I still give and get encouraging txts and messages from the girls at IWU. Praying for them and being prayed for! So awesome!

Tuesday mornings there is a prayer meeting that takes place in Ms. Ferguson's room at 7am. There is a solid group of about 15-20 who have committed to come each week, then also people who come in and out. However, that solid group, I feel, has become the prayer warriors of Lewis Palmer. All year, especially this semester, we have been praying for a movement, a revolution, in the school. The mornings are powerful prayers full of passion and scripture. Austin Hawk, a dear friend, and I have shared on numerous occasions that God is doing work; strong, powerful, hidden, and meaningful. A few of us felt that in our hearts God was about to make a huge move. Not knowing what it was, we remained faithful and obedient to Him. The Saturday night before spring break, there was an event called Unify. It invited all the youth groups in Monument to come together for a night of worship. And it was just that. A night filled of unity and community. My friend Austin Hawk spoke. He preached on unity. God is doing work at Lewis Palmer and in Monument, and Austin is intoned to it. The scripture that he used during his message was none other than from the book that has been on my heart the past few months, Ephesians chapters 4 and 5. He read that, and I could feel God tugging on my shirt saying, "Yes, this is it! Become one and all I want you to do is love as my son loved you." It was time for something big to happen. Spring break was great, spent it in Mexico with my family, until the night I came home. My driveway was snowed in, so I got dropped off at Austin's house to hang out and watch bball with my friends until we could reach the house. About 45 min after my arrival, Tyler Yoder got a weird text message from a number in Cali saying RIP Levi Patrick. Levi Patrick was our dear friend, there was no way. We made a few frantic phone calls, just to find out it was true. No one believed it.
Saturday, May 2, 2010 Levi Patrick died in a car accident on his way home from a road trip from California with his friends.

The first day back from break was hard, really hard. Being a peer counselor, i took on the responsibility of being strong for my classmates that needed it most. The school auditorium was open all day for kids to come in if they couldn't sit in class. There were sheets of paper on the stage where they could write something to the family, to Levi, or just a prayer. Some incredible things were written. We also plugged in an ipod for the day. Worship music all day long. ok so i'm going to say just a little bit about Levi. He was a servant of God, a leader, a friend, a son, a brother, a homecoming king, a football star, elite athlete, gentalmen, colorado boy. Above all his many attributes, Levi is remembered for his heart for God. Even those who don't believe in God know this. They see what a man of Christ is capable of doing. Levi's death has saved so many lifes. We prayed for a movement, an awaking, and we got in. There is no doubt in my mind that we have recieved it. Thank you, God. Ok, so in the auditorium we had worship music playing and there were hundreds of students, facalty, and outsiders in and out throughout the day. Prayer, songs, readings, fellowship, tears, comforting, writing, and so much more took place in there on that monday. I witnessed so many miricales happen.

God is moving in some pretty crazy ways. Some of the stuff i can't even find words to describe to you right now, but i know what he is doing. One of the biggest and most evident things i saw God working on were different relationships. People realized that life is too short, and its not worth not being "ok" with someone. Broken relationships were mended. Old break-ups that resulted to not talking didn't exist any longer, and old friends with grudges became impossible to find. I saw one inparticular that broke my heart and all i could do was smile. My friend Jermey Dill has not spoken with a guy Richie Eaton in a long time. Jermey was sitting down in the front of the auditorium and Richie walked in, no one knew what would happen next. Jermey stud up, they starred at eachother for a moment or two, then simply embraced eachother with tears. As easy as that! God does things we can't understand and we would have never been able to, isn't that why he is the Almighty God? There are numerous stories similar to this one. I am a part of that number. AJ and I dated, broke up when i left the country. I was home and he had moved on to a new girl. Fine with me, not a problem at all, but for some reason we supconsciensly decided that talking and socializing was not an option. We broke that silent agreement quickly. Its just not neccassary in a world like this. Hundreds, i mean hundreds, of relationships are now standing at a much better place. God taught us that its pointless and not worth it to not be on good terms with someone. We are all human, we all have the same feelings, why act like thats different than what it really is? (Phil 5:2 ..to iron out their differences and make up. God doesn't want his children holding grudges.")

As that day moved on, i was feeling pretty drained by lunchtime. For some reason God gave me a strong heart and i remained composed for the day. Dispite the envirment i was in. However, lunchtime was slow and most of the other pc's had left to grab lunch. So i decided that i really needed a pick me up and a refreshment. So i went to the back chairs and i opened up to my bible in Philipians. I started reading. Read half of the book. God's timing is incredible beceause the begining of the book was about loving people and living a life like Jesus lived. That message is alive and will never be stripped from us, so we must use it. also on how we must rejoice together. that everything we do we must do it readily and cheerfully. I stopped reading in the middle of chapter 3 where Paul wrote on knowing God personally. "All things i once thought were so important are gone from my life. Capred to the high prvilege of knowing Christ Jesus as my Master, firsthand, everything i once thought i had going for me is insignificant." Phil 3:7-8 It was no accident that i chose to stop reading at that moment. The next hour or two had so many conversations with poeple on that exact subject, not sparked by my words but by theirs. God is sooo good! His timing is unbelievable. A number of girls came up to me and asked if we could start a bible study because.... then they would break down before Christ. All i could do was smile. The whole day people were morning and grieving for Levi, all i could do was rejoice in what Christ has done! I decided to pick up my bible again and finish Phil because it had so much to offer earlier. The rest of the book is about focussing on the goal and prayer. God spoke throgh Paul saying that, "If any of you have some else in mind, something less than total commitment, god will clear your blurred vision- you'll see it yet!" That is exactly what He has done with Levi. He has cleared our blurred vision and made it obvious that we are living for Him, nothing else. Nothing else even matters. Paul also wrote about prayer. " Dont fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray...Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come settle you down. It's wonderful wht happens when Christ displaces worry at the cener of your life."

Prayer is powerful. i beleive, scratch that- i know, that the silent prayer for someone is more powerful than prayers outloud for individuals. Don't get me wrong, praying for and with people is important and very much so needed, but God is a goofy God were we can pray al the time in our heads, and God will reveal things in crazy crazy ways. It has been so incredible to see kids i never would have imagined at this time in their lives to turn them around and follow Jesus! I lvoe it! The school is moving, and its not just students. Staff members are touched, changed, and encouraged. its a pretty cool thing to seee happening. Some of it is a slow process, really slow. but that is what we are meant to do, plant the seeds no matter how small they are. Now, i feel like this seed planted is slightly bigger than a mustard seed... but hey, what ever works ya know?

As that week moved on, i continued to see God working. No shock there. Nate Matteson, Jake Oakey, and Chase Yaegar were in the car with Levi. 3 walking miricals right there. Chase walked out of the hospital with some scratches and a concussion, Nate spent a few days with extra care just to leave with 27+ broken bones and head injuries, and Jake walked out with scratches, head injuries, and painful images in his head. I have known all three guys throughout high school, jake since 8th grade, and nate since 5th grade. The Matteson's and my family have soccer, summer boating, and family function memories together. Hearing that Nate came so near to death was hard to grasp, but knowing he and Christ are so solid now was quite the refresher. Chase, I think, was a believer before the accident but ever since has been a different man living for a different reason. And Jake, Jake is a morman. One of the sweetest guys I know. I got the chance to really sit down and be real with Jake. Scratches will heal, but pain and images take a different medication to remove. Jake never blacked out during that accident and got up running to help his friends, only to find one of them already gone. Imagine... I can't even. I did my best to comfort Jake and guide him through some of the trama. There is only so much a friend can do in a situation like this... The following week, Zack Meerkreebs (a dear friend to the Matteson's) started a bible study at the Matteson's on Tuesday nights. The first few weeks we had nearly 20+ people there. Eager to hear about this guy named Jesus that Levi was so in love with.

Levi's funneral was incredible. Held at New Life Church and packed full. Hundreds of people were there. The speakers and musicians all did so well. The conclusion of the ceremony was unbelievable. The pastor called for anyone who wanted to commite their life to Christ to the front steps. Nearly one hundred people, students, teachers, and adults came to the stairs to be saved. Just what Levi would have wanted. All he wanted to do was to save just one life, just one. His legacy will forever live, and the hundreds of lives he saved will forever thank him. God smiles towards Levi. I had yet to shed a tear over Levi's death. I had been so awstruck over God's movement and all that he had been doing that smiles powerfully replaced any sort of grieving or pain. One week after the funneral I decided to attend New Life sunday service with Bobby and the Howards. The end of the service Pastor Brady Boyd touched on the funneral service ealier that week. He didn't spend but 45 seconds on the subject, but for some reason it got to me. I couldn't stop crying! Now if you dont know me, I am not a cryer, especially in public. Nope, not me at all... but I just could not stop! I left realizing that I need to put some focus on myself and stop trying to make everyone better. I learned that everyone needs to take care of themself sooner rather than later in order to be a real help. Also, learned that you must greive; and that it is an ok thing to do...

The Lewis Palmer High School Class of 2010 became one after that saturday night. Not only did walking through the halls feel different, but it felt real. Love is a powerful word, I have always known that, but I am not sure I have ever seen it alive the way it was at school the last few months of high school.

God does wonders, His timing is simple perfection, and His love is extravagant.

Ephisians 5:1-2
Watch was God does, and then you do it, like children who learn proper behavior from their parents. Mostly what God does is love you. Keep company with him and learn a life of love. Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He did not love in order get get something from us but he loved to give everything of himself to us. Love like that.

Sorry this is like 2 months late, didnt notice i never got it out....


Ok to start off, wanted to inform you of where I am. I am in a hotel in Seattle and its like 4 am. I left Iceland 5pm Iceland time. Landed in Seattle 445pm Seattle time. (went back in time- weird) and had to run to catch the denver flight that took off at 550…. Got there THREE minutes late. THREE minutes!! Gates closed at 540 and it was exactly 543. Pretty discouraged. But I was with my friend Toni who has been in Iceland to and we had been praying all day that we would make the flight. And secretly I thought I knew that we would never make it. But then she said something on one of the trains that made my mind change. She said, what is prayer without faith? She is totally right. So I changed my mind set and went go to the gate, we were actually way closer to making it than I thought we would ever be. Then I realized God was just slapping me in the face. He totally revealed to me exactly what Toni said. What is prayer without faith? I thought that was really cool. So, by that time it was about midnight my time and exhausted. Had to get a shuttle to a hotel across the street and book a room. Crashed in bed at 7 o’clock Seattle time and about 2 am my time. I woke up at 1130 pm Seattle time and totally ready to start my day! It was about 830am Iceland time and my body is so used to getting up at that time. So for that past like 5 hrs I have been wrestling in bed and now just wide awake. Haha. Its 4 am here! Funny funny. Prayer is becoming more and more important to me. It has always been there, but never to this extent. I have developed these habits when I’m walking to the bus or through downtown in Iceland that I just pray and think and talk to God. It’s awesome. He just wants to know what’s up. So why not tell him. Haha. This last month has been especially focused and narrowed down on faith for me. And what perfect timing for God to slap me in the face then on the last day of my travelings to make me 100% sure of how important prayer and faith go hand in hand. One won’t work right without the other.

But…. This last week has been great. I landed home from Poland on Monday night. Uh sort of a mix up at the airport that was really frustrating. Toni and I mixed up who was picking us up from there. My family dropped off and hers was supposed to pick up. IDK things just didn’t work out. –but it was all good. We took a bus into Reykjavik which then we had to connect onto Straeto to get back home. Worst part of that was that I was on the first buts and drove literally right past my backyard. I mean I could see inside my house, but had to pass it. Then had to stay on that bus for 30 more min, switch buses and ride another 45 min… so I was RIGHT THERE but couldn’t get off, talk about frustrating. Anyway, had a lovely dinner with the family then off to bed! Tuesday I headed into Glaetan that Christian café and hung out with a few of my friends there. Then my friend Beta picked Toni and I up from there and we went to her sister’s saloon and …. And I CUT MY HAIR! Yup. It’s virtually all gone. I think I cut like 10 inches or something. Really short. I have always said I wanted to do that, so decided to do it while in Iceland. But, I haven’t told anyone and home and pretended my skype camera didn’t work so no one at home knows… it’s going to be a cool surprise. Then that night helped Eric St. Clair sort of with the Tuesday night dinner things that he and his wife Kati put on. Kati was outta town so Toni and I kinda helped out, maybe, a little. Eric and Kati are the couple that live about Glaetan in a really cool loft. Really awesome couple, with an incredible testimony. They’re awesome! But every Tuesday night they make a dinner for 10 or 15 people and just have fellowship with whoever shows up. They just have an open invitation and love it when new people come, old people come. Just totally open and really cool. Wednesday I spent a lot of the day just hanging out with my friends and sort of saying goodbye. Cook Steinar Mac’n’Cheese. Went to the big church tower with Stebbi. Stopped by Colby and Annie’s place but missed them. Just sort of making my rounds saying buy to people. I wasn’t much of a fan of that. I am really gunna miss these people. At around 2 Toni and I took Eric out for a lunch and that was my goodbye because I knew I wouldn’t see him again. Its hard saying bye to people. I really honestly am not a fan of it. But, just means that we will have to meet back up someday in life! Excited already for that day to come! That night I spent time with my handball team. We went to café aroma for dinner and just had a nice time together, eating, talking, joking. It was really fun to be with everyone, but not the best when we had to say goodbye. I will really miss those girls as well. They became girls that I really enjoyed spending time with as well and got to know pretty well. So I know that I will most definitely have to meet up with them again someday too. They had practice at 9 so they all had to go, and I cant remember what I did actually… o well. But I do remember that about 1030 I sat on the coach with Tomas to watch some futbol and feel asleep in a second! But I was awaken around 1115 by the doorbell. 4 girls from the team came to the house with 2 sweatshirts and a jersey. I guess coach Aegir was going to give it to me but I didn’t make it to practice. That was really really nice of him. I got one Haukar sweatshirt and two Icelandic jerseys. Really awesome! Thursday was really fun for me. I packed some in the morning then went out around Hofnarfjordur and just went shopping and touring the things that I always wanted to do but never got to. I went into the Viking Hotel. I passed that 3 times a day and never went in it, so I did. And just sort of had a relaxing day taking the bus places and spending time alone. I had said my goodbyes to pretty much everyone by then, and didn’t want to have to do it again. Haha. Got back home around 2, and because it was thanks giving day my family decided to celebrate it. So Erla, Anna, and I began cooking at 2 and didn’t stop until about 730. It was really fun to spend time in the kitchen with the ladies cooking. We actually pulled off a pretty decent thanksgiving dinner. Not too shabby if you ask me! The whole family sat down together and ate. Grams and Gramps too. Then after dinner around 10 Erla and I went for a walk in search for some mountain grass. A while ago on a hike we got some and made this really good tea with it. So I wanted to get some to bring home to bobby because I knew he would love it! We spent like 2 hrs in the middle of a cold windy night searching for this stuff, finally got some and then in 2 min at the airport it gets taken away! Of course!!! I was sooo upset! That was bobby’s gift! So lame…. o well, that’s life right? But if it weren’t for that grass, I wouldn’t have learned what it’s like to pray with faith, real faith. So Toni keeps reminding me that if it takes a missed plane to learn a lesson like that, then it’s worth sleepless night in Seattle.
I don’t really know how to end all of this. There are way too many things to say and do and tell and describe from my time away. I have learned, changed, seen, and experienced so much. Too much probably! Lol. I really have enjoyed myself, to the max. I loved Iceland so much. I loved everything about it; to good and the bad. Both times I needed, and both times I learned something from them. If I could tell you everything I would, but I can’t. Now get me with bits and pieces, that I can do. So I guess this just means that you’ll have to sit down with me on more than once occasion and we can talk about life and how good God is. How does that sound? I cannot wait to be home and give all my friends the hugs and stories that have wished I could have been giving them throughout my entire time here. I am just so happy to be coming home, and more thankful than ever for the place I liv