Coming to an End....

Well well....My time in Iceland rapidly made it to the final four days. I have lots to do, way to much to do actually, before I head home to the God all Might United States! O how I miss America! o dear. Time to come home, eat some Chipotle and Red Robbin! Yummy. Hoping to get Toni's little brother to get us Red Robbin as we get off the plane then stopping at Chipotle on the way home. haha! We shall see...But I have to update you on the rest of the Poland Trip.

I think I left off with our really cool game against the senior national team. That was an incredible day. Very fun. Tuesday I do believe. Then on Wed we traveled in the morning time to a city called Szczyrk where one of the four Olympic Training Centers in Poland is located. We took the bus there and it was about an hour and half drive or so I would guess. I hadn't been feeling to well the night before and I think I had a fever throughout the night. So on the bus I got really sick and pretty sure my fever picked up again. I haven't been sick in a long time, forgot how sucky it is. Anyway, we made it to this little "mountain" town with a small ski resort somewhere I think. (mountains about the size of mnt herman-not too big)We got our rooms put together, I got an awesome room with Molly and Kate. Both incredibly awesome girls. Love em to death. We had a practice in the afternoon right in the complex at the gym there. Really nice gym. Practice went well dispute me being sick. On Thursday we had two practices. At breakfast coach Marco and Dan Bush (trainer)suggested that I didn't practice and got healthy. So I had even intention on listening to them, however I rested up some after breakfast and felt that running around wouldn't do any harm. If anything it would just be good for me. So I went with everyone to practice and felt I actually did quite well. Then afternoon practice was a different story though. O well, guess you can't be on your game alll the time. I started to get really excited for Friday afternoon. The morning slowly came after a rough rough night. Not sleeping much because of a cough and a fever is not fun. Light 1 hr morning practice then game in the afternoon. We rode a bus just 15 min to a gym in town with the junior Norway team to compete against them. They are world champions... so basically the worst team in the world had to play the best team in the world... guess how that one turned out!? haha. Nei joke. It wasn't that bad... We held our own pretty nicely actually the first little bit. But they played a 4 2 defense and the girls that played most have never played against that. So that was a total disaster. Just about every goal they scored was off of a fast break. I played a few min in the first half and about 13 or 14 min in the second half. The last few min of the game we had two girls get a 2 min. That means we play down a man for 2 min. So I was one of the lucky 4 that got to play the ending of a game against the best team in the world 4vs6.... Lucky eh? But before they fouled out we did get 4 goals in. The final score was something like 11-48 or something. Pretty high score for handball. But we learned a lot and that is exactly why USA went. Saturday I started to feel a little better by morning. Rough night again, hate that. We had our last practice of the tournament, another short one in morning. Around 4 we played Czech Republic junior national team. That game actually turned out to be a little bit closer until second half. We played at the gym in town again. This actually was an upsetting day for me. I was looking forward so much to play Czech because my grandpa is Czech and so just playing our heritage was a cool idea to me. So I was really ready and excited, and turns out I am the only player that didn't get a chance to play. Anca thinks that Marco may have just forgot about me, guess we will never know that truth. I spoke with him later that night about it and he said that jugs sometimes games just don't go your way. He mentioned that Sunday's game would be a great game for the players who didn get to play much this week play a lot. So I was looking forward to that. Then on Sunday we just had an early game against Poland Junior National team. It was held just in the gym at the OTC that we had been staying at. The game started off with the starters and we were doing really well. Half time score was only 7-16 or something like that. It was a close game that we kept ourselves in. Our goals Toni and Sophie did bomb that game!!! So I was expecting to play second half because that is what Marco said he was going to do, that didn't happen. He kept the Europeans in for most of it. With 15 min left the bench finally got to go in. And just my luck, my shin splints would not go away. They were bothering me all week but the pain would escape my mind once I started playing. But this game was really bad for some reason. My vertical was maybe 2 inches, they were so painful. So I pulled myself off after about 7 min or so. I let them get so bad I couldn't straighten my feet. Not goood. I'm used to playing on nice soft grass, not hard courts. So the last two games did no go well for me. However, USA improved dramatically each game. It was really fun to be a part of and watch and see and cheer on. Each game got rougher and rougher.

I learned a lot in the 9 days I was in Poland. Learned even more about handball, as always, but beyond the sport, I learned a lot about myself. I went through some pretty intense emotions while I was there. First off, I was wearing a USA jersey. Now tell me that doesn't just rock your world in itself. Hearing the anthem play after your name was called before each game was just a feeling I will never be able to explain to you. Truly indescribable. Then coming together as a team before each game, wishing another country (not just team but country) good luck and then doing a USA cheer was awesome too. Really cool. So playing with those emotions was a task in itself. Then I feel like I showed a lot of character playing through the swine flu. I am pretty positive that is what I have been fight because its been in my house in Iceland for about 2 weeks now. I was bound to get it, I think that just traveling and lots of activity over did it and I finally caved in. Perfect timing eh? I learned a lot about mind games. If you let your thoughts win and take you over, there is no hope. But when you stay strong and focused, you're golden. I had to really focus down on that with my confidence this week. I do not feel like the coaches were able to see my full capability of handball because of various reasoning's. Didn't play in my position I have been training in for 3 months, was sick, and had shin splints. All lame factors, but alive and real to me. And because some of those things came into action when I didn't get to play in the only game that was personal to me, it crushed me. I had go dig deep and remember what I was doing in Poland. Had to remember that I wasn't there for my own glory and satisfaction. Had to remember that God brought me to Poland to glorify him and to serve him. I wore a USA on my jersey representing Him, not me, not even USA, but God. I was broken down to an altime sports low that would have been extremely hard to pull myself out of. Thinking it was merely impossible actually. Then Saturday night I got to the hotel; been holding back tears for about 2 hours now. Tears of anger, embarrassment, and frustration. Then I got an email. An email from mommy that God had perfect timing on. Mom's always know best and know when their baby's need the extra boost. She sent everything I needed to hear. And I couldn't hold my tears in any longer, but they weren't tears of those bad and hurtful feelings I was feeling.They were tears of pure joy and satisfaction. God is good. Tha is all I could say. God is good. He is so real, and is so powerful. He comes through to us when we need him most, we when think nothing else is important and we have a confidence radar at zero, God shows up in the weirdest yet most apparent ways. Its impossible for me to not believe in this Almighty God. He works in ways that I cannot descibe. He is incredible. He built up my confidence in a matter of minutes. Something that probably would have taken a long time, if ever at all. I was shown that no matter what happens, what is said, or how things turn out God is always the one in the end that matters. And he is the one that all the glory goes to, all the joy goes to, and all the satisfaction goes to. People, coaches, teammates, fans, referees may/will crush you and break you down, but that is when you have to let all those words and actions brush off you shoulders and at the end of the day lift them all up to God. We have to dig deep within ourselves to find the true meanings of htings. Whether its a love of a game, or a friendship, or a desire, want, wish. Whatever it may be, with God's help, the search and execution is only possible with God. He is good.

I have 4 more days here. 4 days that I have filled to the max with getting friends, shopping, dinners, practices, and last minute adventures in before I head home. It is going to be busy, hectic, and memorable. I cannot wait! I will write one last time just before I head home... Pray for safety, fun, and excitement for my last few days in Iceland! Thanks. love an dmiss you all! xoxo-hollinator!